


play pretend

by heonied (orphan_account)



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Celebrity, Angst, Complicated Relationships, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Not So Subtle Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-28
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-07-18 09:35:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16115705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/heonied
Summary: where rising star hyunwoo is met with a risky propostion of a publicity stunt, and it's down to his manager to put aside his feelings and deal with the aftermath.





	1. blessed are the oblivious

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this has been sitting in my drafts for a while. i wanted to know what people think about the idea so please do feel free to comment with your thoughts and expectiations. a lot of stuff planned out for this one, some twists and turns. we'll see where it goes.

kihyun pushes his way through the lobby, feeling himself suffocate as the cameras point at them and all the hands reach just to touch. they reach for his throat, forming a lump in it, for his ears, to cover them and create a static noise in his head. a murmur barely audible, camera shutters, screams and raised voices, questions that won't get their answers, but most distinctive of all — the name on everyone's mouth: son hyunwoo.

the truth is kihyun's just a man in the background, the one whose face gets blurred out in all the fansite pictures. but the one hyunwoo, as any other celebrity, needs the most.

when they step into the elevator, when they're not being swarmed anymore and the security has somehow reappeared by their side, kihyun truly feels like he's going to pass out.

“what happened there? where the hell were you? your incompetence could have put my client's health at a severe risk.” kihyun starts spitting out before even getting himself back together, and it shows in how breathless he seems to be.

“i'm fine.” hyunwoo responds calmly, as the bodyguards look at each other with grave faces.

“the situation was out of control.” one of them speaks up.

“well, isn't it your job to control it?” kihyun shoots back before he feels a hand weigh down on his shoulder and he turns around to meet hyunwoo's eyes that are undoubtedly telling him to drop it.

kihyun furrows his eyebrows but obeys, taking in a deep breath before eyeing hyunwoo's frame whole, hurriedly scanning for any damage.

“are you alright?” he asks before reaching his hands out to tug at hyunwoo's jacket in attempt to make it look more presentable. it's not much use, someone in the crowd must have pulled at it and stretched it into it's current position, and nothing could fix it now other than a hot iron.

“i said i'm fine, kihyun.”

kihyun's mind knows the jacket is a lost cause, but his hands keep meddling with it.

“someone must have leaked your schedule.” he scoffs. “no doubt someone on that rapper's press team. i don’t understand how he could have any business with you anyway. he's not getting on tv with that face.” kihyun proceeds to fix the buttons on hyunwoo's tormented jacket. “either way i'll make sure to find whoever's responsible.”

hyunwoo lets out a chuckle. “his face is not all that bad.” he says shamelessly and kihyun bites his lower lip to keep himself from commenting. “but i've seen a few interviews and he doesn’t have the composure for it. he'd be a poor actor, yes.”

“you've done your research?”

“a man gets bored in the evenings.”

the elevator stops at the thirteenth floor, and although kihyun is not a superstitious man, the number does catch his gaze and he only prays this time it brings them luck.

hyunwoo's lawyer and personal assistant are both already there in the hallway, looking quite tense. surely because they got out of the hell that was the building's ground floor before their own boss, leaving him and poor kihyun to fend for themselves. not exactly something you could get a promotion for.

“mr. son, i trust you're alright?” hyungwon speaks up, an elegant bag swung around his shoulders and a stoic expression on his face.

“perfectly fine.” hyunwoo shoots back. he is always uncomfortable when people seem to fixate on making sure he's okay all of the time, but kihyun tells him that's just what happens when you're someone this important.

“are they here already?” kihyun asks as his eyes scan through the hallway. the floors, squeaky clean, seem to reflect the surface above them, although quite blurry. kihyun's feet tap on them lightly as he moves, and they seem fragile enough that if he were heavier they'd surely crack underneath him.

the walls are painted white which just makes the light coming in through the large wall windows all the more blinding.

a minimalistic setup, and quite modern, but kihyun feels as if the place was completely uninhabited. there is no life, and none of the usual hustle of a corporate office on a tuesday morning.

“yup.” minhyuk's voice successfully stops his train of thought. “waiting for us just down the hallway.”

“didn't even bother to send a welcome party, huh?” kihyun murmurs under his breath.

“let's go then?” hyunwoo offers, head already turned towards the place they're supposed to go.

“minhyuk, you can stay.” he gestures at the boy who looks like he's about to loudly protest but stops himself when he feels everyone's eyes on him.

hyunwoo approaches the door and opens it in a swift motion, waiting by it as he smiles at kihyun. “after you.”

x

kihyun blinks at the two men before him, completely dumbfounded. he doesn't think they can be serious, having the urge to laugh at them for a moment, but then reminds himself he needs to be professional. so he uses all his willpower not to scoff at their words, and brings himself back to his place. his place as hyunwoo's manager. he realises he's the one who they're waiting on to speak.

“with mr. son’s much higher net worth and increasing popularity, you can clearly see how this benefits your client more than mine.” he begins, eyes focused but his eyebrows furrow quickly. “what exactly is supposed to convince us to agree to this? we aren't interested in charity, sir.”

hyunwoo sends him a disapproving glare that he can see out the corner of his eye but the young man before him doesn't seem phased by his words.

“we are not asking for it, of course. this is a mutual agreement that benefits both sides.” the black haired boy smiles at him, and kihyun doesn't sense any obvious ill intentions behind it.

his client on the other hand is leaning back in his chair, eyes squinted as he chews on his cheek, little blonde curls falling down on his forehead. cute, but not cute enough to cover the fact that he clearly isn't too satisfied with this situation either.

“we both know bad press and gossip are deadly weapons. and, as you mentioned, with mr. son's remarkable popularity the media are willing to go to incredible lengths just to have his name on the cover.” the boy says in a deep voice, his fingers nervously playing with the folder laid out in front of him. kihyun notices his nails are painted black.

he's been trained to spot such small things — _not someone's manicure, of course_ — the twitching of the man's hand that signifies he's nervous. although kihyun’s got to give it to him, he wouldn't be able to tell just by listening to him speak. the boy handles himself well.

“what i'm trying to say is it's good to be in control of the general public's opinion. and such publicity stunts are one of the most popular ways to do it, wouldn't you agree mr. yoo?”

kihyun licks his lips and lets his eyes take a break from making contact with the rapper's manager for a brief moment.

"i do agree fame is fleeting and sometimes it needs a little push, but-” kihyun looks over to search for an answer in hyunwoo's eyes but those are focused on something ahead of him and kihyun turns his head to realise both the clients in question seem to be having a conversation of their own.

something stirs in his gut at that moment, and he looks down at his hands, clearing his throat loudly before he even realises it.

hyungwon seems to notice, and speaks out for the first time since the meeting began.

“i assume that is the contract before you, yes?” he focuses his eyes on the paper neatly laid out on the table and soon everyone else follows suit.

“yes, indeed. we have crafted it having both sides in mind and we're open to any changes and adjustments that you may wish to make.”

“may i see it?” the rapper's manager nods and smoothly slides the contract across the table, for hyungwon to start scanning his dark eyes through.

“and just how many people know about this?” kihyun inquires.

“just the higher management of our company. including the ceo, our press team, mr. lee and i.”

“and i trust you are all prepared to keep it a secret?”

the boy smiles. “yes, just like we expect of your team, sir.”

kihyun looks over at hyungwon sitting to his right but the man is still lost in his reading.

“we should take this home and think on it.” hyunwoo's deep voice looms through the room and kihyun takes a deep breath.

maybe it's the hectic events from earlier, maybe it's just that he got up on the wrong side of the bed today or maybe he's just really not doing well with his job lately — but the fact is, kihyun feels lost in this very moment. not only that, but he realises the main cause for it is him letting his own feelings intervene with his job. and he's really damn mad at himself for it.

but hyunwoo's right. most importantly, they need to speak about this in private, without the other side following their every reaction.

x

“isn't this basically the same thing hyunwoo-hyung did with shin hoseok?” minhyuk comments, unnecessarily loudly after getting filled in on the hot details.

“you can't say that arrangement didn’t work out well. look at him now!” he points at hyunwoo sitting down in one of the two armchairs in the room, the other one occupied by his lawyer.

the difference is, hyungwon is still deeply lost in the contract he holds against his knees, engulfed by it like a high school student doing his revision at the last moment, while hyunwoo is comfortably laid out in his seat, looking at kihyun with something the man can't quite read.

“shin hoseok endorsed him, not lied to the whole world about being in a relationship with him.” kihyun shoots back, annoyed.

the assistant scoffs and it makes kihyun's blood boil. “because you’re suddenly against lying?”

“this isn’t about morality, minhyuk,” kihyun tries to keep himself composed, reminding himself of hyunwoo's piercing gaze upon him. “it's about this whole deal being an inch away from turning into a scandal at any time. are you his damn manager or am i?”

“and don’t i get to speak for myself?” hyunwoo asks calmly and kihyun can't do much but shut his mouth and obediently nod at him.

“this is me having to pretend i'm in love with someone, you said it yourself, didn't you?” despite his words, his tone is neither accusing nor scolding. kihyun is surprised to admit it, but he sounds slightly amused, if anything.

yet kihyun doesn't find this situation amusing at all.

“the final decision is, of course, up to you, mr. son.” hyungwon gently chimes in, smiling at hyunwoo and getting him to turn towards him. “i would like to go through all the elements of this contract with you, however, given the chance. it is good to know your options.”

hyunwoo nods and they decide to spend the evening in his office, discussing something kihyun wishes they could just say no to and be done with.

x

the knocking on his door wakes kihyun from his half-asleep state, and surprises him to a point where he slams his knee on the desk as he gets up to unlock the entrance.

“can i come in?” hyunwoo asks after a moment of silence on kihyun's part, where he hurriedly tries to button up his shirt and mumbles something about not expecting to see his boss at such a late hour.

hyunwoo settles in on the couch in kihyun's office with a heavy sigh followed by the sort of smile he gives people he pities.

it beats kihyun off track and he remains quiet, returning to his desk and waiting for hyunwoo to talk first.

“long day.” he states simply and kihyun has to agree.

“wanted to come talk to you about this jooheon business. you know, without other people listening.”

even though this seems to be more of a social visit, the actor looks just as professional as ever. neat expensive suit with a silk shirt underneath, the top button open which is as much a casual look as hyunwoo ever lets himself wear around the building.

kihyun swears he can count on the fingers of his right hand how many times he’s seen hyunwoo wear something other than a suit around him in the last 2 years.

kihyun nods. “we can discuss it, of course.”

but hyunwoo doesn't say anything after that, just waits and stares at kihyun with another one of those unreadable looks.

kihyun swallows a bit too visibly and can't help but bring a hand to rub at his forehead, trying to chase the last bits of sleep away from his mind.

“you're tired.” it's not really a question, but a statement and kihyun can't argue with it. it only takes eyes to notice that. he must look horrible right now.

“you don't look ecstatic about it.” kihyun raises his eyebrows and hyunwoo is fast to clarify “the arranged relationship thing. you don't think it could work?”

the man bites on his lower lip and wonders how to appropriately phrase his thoughts.

“i don't see how it benefits us in any way. if anything it's more of a risk to your reputation if the truth were to ever come out.” kihyun pushes back on his chair and the wheels make an unpleasant noise as they carry him lightly away from the desk.

“i’ve seen the statistic his team provided, the marketing moves and campaigns. our supposed gains.” kihyun continues.

“all of it... is wishful thinking.”

“you don't think i could pull it off?”

kihyun chokes back a bit and eyes his employer. “you are an extraordinary actor, mr. son. i do not doubt for a second that you would make it as believable as it can be. it's the other party i am worried about.”

“you call me that again when it's just the two of us and i swear i'll punch you.” kihyun knows he doesn't mean it when he looks into hyunwoo's eyes and sees the amusement hidden in them, and the slight pull at the corners of his plump lips.

he would prefer to call him by his surname though, he would prefer to keep it as professional as he can because it's so much easier, and his heart seems to beat more steadily when there's other people surrounding them and hyunwoo's attention isn't entirely focused on him. just like in this moment. he wonders if the man notices that, and stresses him out on purpose.

“i've discussed it with hyungwon.” hyunwoo's voice brings kihyun back to earth and the boy wonders if he's missed anything hyunwoo said while he was lost in his thoughts.

“as much as i hate the commotion, more press means more money. and i wouldn't mind if it could help me retire sooner.” hyunwoo jokes and clearly expects kihyun to reciprocate his smile which the man does, even though a bit late.

“don't say that unless you intend to start paying me more so i can retire as well.”

hyunwoo chuckles at that and his head falls to the side in such a carefree way. kihyun wonders why his eyes always seem to catch all those small details.

“if you have an issue with the paycheck, you should have come talked to me about it, mr. yoo. i'm sure we can arrange something.”

kihyun's mouth falls slack trying to form a coherent response to that and his mind can't help but note how suggestive hyunwoo's tone is. he tells himself he’s being ridiculous and chuckles in response, trying not to embarrass himself further.

“if i'm ever down on my luck i'll make sure to take you up on that offer.” he blabbers back and hyunwoo's smile slowly fades as they sit in silence, his face becoming more stoic. kihyun wishes he could say something to bring that smile back.

“if you don’t want me to do it tell me.” hyunwoo sits up straight on the couch, making sure kihyun's eyes are met with his “i trust you. and i'm not sure about this at all. but if you tell me, right now, that i shouldn't do this...” his eyebrows are knitted, tone serious and low and kihyun has never felt more conflicted in his life. “i won't question that decision.”

kihyun doesn't know what makes hyunwoo think he has a right to leave something like this up to him. why he thinks it's okay to put this sort of pressure on him.

it feels like some sort of test. like there is only one correct answer to hyunwoo's question and if kihyun doesn't figure out what it is hyunwoo expects of him, he's going to fail. 

it always comes down to his emotions, doesn't it? them getting in the way of his professionalism. that damn gut feeling, the intuition he tells himself he has, but no one has ever told him if it's wise to listen to or not.

and he surprises even himself, when with a straight face and a steady tone he answers hyunwoo's dilemma.

“i think you should do it.”


	2. dubious rendezvous

one of the boy's hands rests on top of the paper, holding it in place, the other swiftly leaving a signature, as if it was in a hurry to get it over with. 

another hand, decorated in black passes it over to the other side of the table and kihyun watches it come ever so closer to him with worry. 

hyungwon reaches over to take it into his hands and pass it onto his boss, and that's how the contract travels through different hands to finally reach the most important pair. 

kihyun wishes hyunwoo wouldn't have looked at him, as if making sure, right before grabbing the pen because where he convinced himself they can do this and it's a smart decision, all of that is gone now with just one look in hyunwoo's eyes. 

but before he knows it he sees the paper be stained blue by the big letters s and h and a series of smaller ones that kihyun could never read through. hyunwoo's handwriting is _that_ messy. 

the rapper's manager smiles at kihyun, even though kihyun's aura may not be the most inviting and friendly right now. 

he nods at his client and breaks the silence after what seems like ages. 

"i'm looking forward to working with you all, gentlemen." he says sincerely, maybe a bit too enthusiastically for kihyun's liking "i am convinced this agreement will bring us all many good things in the future."

"kyun." a whisper is heard amongst the quiet room and the manager's sleeve is being tugged on before he leans over to hear what his client has to say.

"right!" he claps his hands, as if he's about to announce something exciting. "we have taken it upon ourseleves to organise a small party, so that we may have a chance to talk in a more casual setting. i'll send out the invitations to your staff members later on today. we do hope we can see you there to celebrate." 

kihyun nods stiffly before they shake hands and take their copy of the contract with them. 

x

hyunwoo seems to get along with jooheon splendidly. which truly just baffles kihyun because he knows his boss, and he has no idea what the two of them could have in common that could result in such an engaging conversation. 

he is glad at least hyunwoo seems to be enjoying himself, because so far kihyun himself has spent more time chasing down the waiters to pick up another glass of champagne than doing anything else. 

he feels his head spin a bit and he knows he needs to stop, because he's technically still at work, as long as hyunwoo is around. but he only now realises how much he needs to just get drunk, to let all this stress from the past few months out. he can't even recall the last time he had gone out in his free time. 

"is there a reason you're standing here all alone looking at your boss like you want to murder him?" 

kihyun jumps in place bumping his elbow on the wall behind him and cursing silently.

"you scared the shit out of me." he scolds as he realises hyungwon is looking at him, with amusement and strange little sparks in his eyes.

he's usually very serious at work, so it's an unusual change seeing him so laidback. he's not wearing a suit either, just a black silken shirt with delicate golden embroidery that fits his slim body really nicely. 

kihyun instinctively reaches down to straighten his jacket and run a hand through his hair, realising he probably looks much less attractive, and desperately trying to make up for it.

"you okay?" hyungwon asks with concern.

kihyun scoffs unintentionally, some kind of defence mechanism launching inside his head. "of course. why would you ask?"

"well i'm pretty sure this isn't your first glass." he nods towards the alcohol kihyun's hand is lazily holding. 

"i have a strong head, don't worry." he dismisses and actually starts looking for opportunities to mingle with someone who isn't looking at him with the ammount of pity hyungwon is.

"right." the lawyer nods, not looking convinced but knowing when to withdraw. "i'll be around." and then he simply walks off, leaving his usual maddeningly nonchalant aura behind him.

kihyun lets himself unglue from the wall and walks over to hyunwoo and his new friend, who are now joined by minhyuk.

as he approaches he can already see minhyuk talking about something excitedly, and quite loudly, though jooheon doesn't seem to mind. 

he has a small smile on his face as he listens to the white haired boy with interest, and kihyun notices that his dimples may as well be the entire focus of his face with how deep and radiant they are. the boy looks adorable, he has to admit, and maybe much less unpleasant than he did in their last two meetings. kihyun thinks that he may have misjudged him, but he hates admitting that to himself. 

hyunwoo notices him approach slowly and waves his hand in order to encourage him further.

he introduces kihyun as his manager, even though the boy is pretty sure jooheon already knows that, but they shake hands anyway and minhyuk goes right back to talking. 

"we just discovered mr. lee has never seen any of hyunwoo-hyung's productions." he says with a shocked expression and jooheon just giggles and shrugs.

"i was telling him about hyung's best movie, which is of course the one he's done in march this year. hyung looks really hot as a soldier." he giggles and hyunwoo's eyes almost shut close as he smiles at him. he's always so shy and cute when taking compliments. 

"i'll do my homework and watch it, i promise." jooheon nods, looking motivated. 

"you should, as interviewers might ask you about them in the future, as well as hyunwoo's career in general." kihyun finds himself saying and jooheon blinks at him for a second before smiling again and nodding yes. 

"you're definitely right, mr. yoo." 

"you could always watch the movies and dramas together with hyunwoo-hyung." minhyuk chimes in excitedly, as if he just came up with a world-changing idea. "he has this huge tv at his apartment!" 

"yes, and after i found you falling asleep on my couch watching 'secretary kim' after dropping me off, you are no longer allowed anywhere near it." hyunwoo laughs. 

minhyuk goes into detailing his favourite hyunwoo movie to jooheon, spoiling half of it in the process and kihyun thinks that perhaps he's not the only one letting himself go with the champagne.

it seems minhyuk is so relaxed he's forgetting all rules of proper etiquette, especially those concerning new clients. 

kihyun feels hyunwoo grab his arm a little more forcefully than necessary and looks down at his hand, confused. 

"sorry." hyunwoo whispers when he realises and lets go, gesturing for them to go instead. 

"i need a word with kihyun." he quickly says when jooheon's eyes come to look at him "minhyuk, please behave."

minhyuk salutes with a smile and turns his back on them, eagerly focusing his entire attention on the rapper.

kihyun walks alongside hyunwoo passing the people gathered in the room and waits for him to speak. hyunwoo grabs a glass of champagne for himself and kihyun, and the manager feels like he can't say no to it, even though he should.

"i felt like i needed to escape, you provided me with that option. at the perfect time too, i don't know how you do it." he smiles slightly before taking a sip of his drink "thanks." 

"minhyuk proving to be a bit too much?" 

"he just wouldn't stop talking about me. i felt like i was being presented at an auction." he sighs and finds a new place for them to stand, away from most of the prying eyes.

"are you having second thoughts?" kihyun enquires.

"no, no." hyunwoo shakes his head as if trying to convince both himself and the other man.

"maybe i'm just too tired for a social gathering like this tonight. this is all very pleasant. and it was a great idea too, it's better to break the ice before we continue working together. it's just..." hyunwoo sighs and rubs his forehead and kihyun feels bad for him. 

"i get it." he slowly gives up on trying to sound eloquent "i can be your excuse not to talk to people. no one's getting through me."

hyunwoo chuckles. "see, i knew you'd understand."

they lean back and quietly watch the room, and if it wasn't for the background music kihyun would likely feel much more awkward. but he's used to it by now, those moments where they're only accompanied by silence, where they don't feel the need to talk as much as just to stand there next to each other and be lost in their own thoughts. appreciating each other's sole respectful company. 

kihyun always wishes he could somehow know hyunwoo's mind though. it frustrates him so much how hard the man is to read, how he never really knows what to expect from him. it keeps him on his feet though, always trying to step carefully around each issue. but it's also tiring. 

kihyun sees jooheon talking with his black haired manager on the other side of the room and their eyes lock for a moment, but the boy quickly averts his gaze, nodding at changkyun after a moment and parting ways.

then he looks back their way and kihyun watches him approach them, wondering if he should keep his promise and swiftly scare the boy away to give hyunwoo his peace.

but jooheon speaks first, not really paying attention to kihyun.

"can we take a walk?" he smiles sheepishly at hyunwoo and kihyun quickly finds out that jooheon seems to be an exception in his boss's request. 

"i'll see you later, kihyun." he nods at the boy as he offers his arm to jooheon and begins to walk away. 

x 

"now you definitely look like you want to murder someone." 

"maybe i do." kihyun mutters back, letting his fingers pull at a loose string in his jacket. 

"you know, normal people start a conversation by saying 'hi'" he comments as he watches hyungwon sit down next to him.

"hi."

kihyun rolls his eyes and sinks further into the couch. 

"when is this going to end." he whines.

"i feel like you're not even _trying_ to have fun." hyungwon comments.

"there is no fun to be had here." kihyun struggles to finish his sentence and hyungwon guffaws.

"that was almost english!"

"fuck you." kihyun shoots back not really knowing why he's getting so defensive.

him and hyungwon rarely talk. now that he thinks about it, this might be in the top five of their longest conversations ever not regarding work.

"what's up with you, kihyun?" 

he doesn't really know how to answer. he feels like giving up.

"i just wanna leave." he whines again, like a small kid, not like the manager of one of korea's most famous actors, and it's absolutely shameful.

hyungwon just stares at him and it makes kihyun's blood boil. he doesn't get to judge him and his state. this is all the alcohol, after all, making him behave this way. it's not his fault. 

"you don't like this situation, clearly." hyungwon states calmly which makes kihyun look up with a puzzled gaze. "why did you tell hyunwoo to do it?" 

"you're assuming hyunwoo needs my permission to do things." he scoffs. 

"i talked to him, you know. we reviewed that contract together. i saw when he had doubts, saw the way his eyebrows knitted when i was explaining something." hyungwon reaches to his pocket and unpacks a piece of gum that he delicately places in his mouth. 

"then he said he'd go talk to you." he continues. "and first thing i know the next morning is i'm reviewing the contract for a final edit." 

kihyun stays silent. 

"you don't like change." hyungwon says as if it was something he was so sure of. "you like the way things are. the film shoots, interviews, galas, even the fan meetings. you like them cause we've done them a thousand times. you can plan them all out. you hate this because you don't know or trust these people, and now you're forced to work with them on something you've never done before."

"are you a lawyer or a fucking psychologist?" 

"tell me i'm wrong." 

kihyun looks into his eyes and tries to find it in himself to confidently tell hyungwon that yes, he _is_ wrong. he doesn't win. but his mouth just betrays him and stays quiet, behind greeted teeth and a pit of anger boiling in his stomach, that he can't exactly tell the cause of.

hyungwon gives him a small reassuring smile. 

kihyun's head spins when he leans forward, almost in a trance. his mind might have stopped functioning, because he doesn't think for a second before he rests his hand on the back of the sofa, and the other on hyungwon's shoulder, and connects their mouths.

it's like he doesn't even realise who he's kissing but it's primal and for some reason hyungwon returns it, slipping his tongue in between kihyun's teeth. 

he doesn't have much time to think on how warm hyungwon's mouth is, or how he sucks down on kihyun's bottom lip for a second, or the heavy scent of hairspray that's easier to smell this close to his face, or the overwhelming taste of mint on hyungwon's tongue. 

sloppily and hungrily he kisses hyungwon and he feels like it lasts forever before he regains his mind and pulls back, staring at hyungwon with a blank expression.

he tries to confirm if he's actually awake and this was _real_ but his head is spinning more than it has been before and it makes the thinking all the more harder. 

" _i'm so sorry_." he whispers before turning away and getting up from the couch without another word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry please dont yell at me
> 
> (actually please do if you want to, i live off every comment i get. any feedback motivates me to write, it really does)


	3. hungry business

hyunwoo isn't much for eating out, fancy restaurants or even fast food places. sure, the idea of both seems like a good way to take a break and enjoy not being cooped up in his apartment, the company building or a film shoot, but having kihyun order food and eat it with him in the car or their offices is just so much simpler. 

this place does have it's charm, he has to admit. all the wooden decour, the plants in every corner and the stunning fairy lights that do wonders for jooheon's glittery eye make-up.

"do you like shrimp?" the boy picks his eyes up from the menu to look at hyunwoo. 

"sure." 

"that's your answer to everything i ask." he furrows his eyebrows and pouts. "you are too polite."

hyunwoo smiles, although he's not quite sure that was meant to be a compliment. 

"what if i end up ordering something you hate and this will be the worst first fake-date ever?" 

"i'll make sure to smile to the cameras nonetheless."

jooheon turns his head slowly at that, scanning the room and the busy sidewalk seen through the window. 

no cameras to be seen yet but some people have been giving them questioning looks, whispering to their friends excitedly and aiming their phones at them, totally failing to go unnoticed. 

hyunwoo can only imagine the posts minhyuk is gonna show him later as he shoves his blindingly bright phone screen in his face. 

as they wait for their food, finally picked by jooheon whose solution to hyunwoo's indesiciveness was just ordering half the menu, hyunwoo reaches to his pocket to bring his own phone out.

it might be the fact that jooheon is sitting right opposite of him, or that hyunwoo momentarily forgot there is someone else here with him, but the rapper seems to pick up on his sudden change of expression.

"is something wrong?" he questions and it takes hyunwoo a second to lift his eyes from the screen and realise he is meant to answer.

"i- no, no." he shakes his head with a small forced smile. "all good. just work stuff."

that's a lie and he knows it, but he hopes jooheon doesn't.

 

"i've never been this full." jooheon whines, his words barely audible due to his cheeks being puffy and filled with food. 

hyunwoo giggles as he continues to eat, grabbing a piece of chicken off of jooheon's plate. 

the younger boy lets out an outraged "hey!", playfully trying to slap hyunwoo's hand away.

"oh, were you gonna eat that?" hyunwoo asks, placing the food in his mouth right after and chewing loudly.

"i might have!"

" _you'd explode_." 

"you don't know me, man." jooheon says in a silly voice that makes his date spit out some of his food. 

at that moment they're blinded by a bright flash, and jooheon is first to turn his head in surprise, in the direction of it's source.

the paparazzi panics, and repeatedly whispers "shit, shit, _shit_ " as he fiddles with his camera. 

hyunwoo figures he didn't mean for the flash to go off, his perfect candid shots now ruined. 

the man backs away, as one of the waiters makes her way towards him, clearly trying to excuse him out of the restaurant. 

"we've been found, i guess." jooheon comments, chewing on his bottom lip. "mission complete?"

hyunwoo hums, distracted. 

they both go quiet, and jooheon tries to force one more shrimp into his mouth, munching on it slowly. 

the waitress stops at their table after hyunwoo waves her over, and he settles the bill despite jooheon's slight protest. 

hyunwoo passes jooheon his coat, helping him put it on gently before grabbing his own and hanging his silk scarf loosely around his neck. 

"there's more of them now." he leans closer to jooheon's ear as they head towards the exit. the boy nods, looking out onto the street. 

"ready to put on a show?" hyunwoo nudges him closer, his hand landing on jooheon's back, gentle but comforting. 

they walk out into the street and it only takes the journalists and fansites a few seconds to start swarming around them. 

they keep their heads down but hold hands as they walk towards the car, the gesture proving easier than hyunwoo thought it would.

he doubts himself for a moment, feels almost dirty for doing all this. but he leaves those thoughts for later, knows the guilt will catch up with him at night, and just carries on telling himself this is part of his job. perhaps one of the hardest roles he's had to play yet.

he settles in the car, waits for it to take off and unlocks his phone, yet the reply he has been waiting for is still not there. 

x

"i need to talk to hyung about his eating habits." 

hyungwon looks over minhyuk's shoulder with curiousity. 

"what do you mean?"

"he has sauce all over his bottom lip in this photo!" minhyuk yells out. "this is what happens when you never go out in public, you become a socially awkward animal."

minhyuk freezes in place and looks at hyungwon and changkyun both with wide eyes. 

"please never tell him i said that." he whispers in the most serious tone. 

"said what now?" hyunwoo's voice looms over from the other side of the room and minhyuk jumps in his seat. 

"hello, mr. son." changkyun stands up from his seat, bowing slightly and completely ignoring minhyuk's exaggerated face expressions.

"hi changkyun." hyunwoo responds calmly, approaching the group but before he can say anything else the door opens again.

kihyun stands in the doorway, motionless at the site of his boss and visibly swallows a lump in his throat that formed in a mere second.

hyunwoo looks over at him and looks almost relieved for a second, as changkyun greets kihyun too and hyungwon just glances in his direction.

"i have a lot of work to do." kihyun excuses himself in the most suspicious way possible, and walks off in the direction of his office as quickly as he appeared. 

 

hyunwoo knocks but hears no answer. 

"kihyun?"

the boy sits at his desk, his laptop already set up and his face hidden behind it.

he doesn't bother to look up at the actor, as he answers in the most blatant tone.

"do you need anything?"

hyunwoo stops and stares for a few seconds, but the boy acts as if he's not even there.

"did you get my texts?"

kihyun's fingers trail on the touchpad.

"yes. as i said, i didn't feel well. i must have fallen asleep before i responded. my apologies."

"have i done something to anger you?"

kihyun ceases all movements and just blinks at his laptop a few times, his tongue tracing over his chapped bottom lip.

"no, of course not." he straightens up and looks in hyunwoo's direction, but not quite his eyes still.

"i have been very busy trying to control the release of all new information about your and mr. lee's agreement." kihyun pushes his chair back and stands up, grabbing a pile of documents off his desk and making his way to place them at one of the shelves next to it. 

hyunwoo's mind is so confused by how the boy is speaking to him, it's almost making him angry.

"the press team needs to be updated regularly on all our moves, otherwise this might get out of control."

"kihyun," hyunwoo interrupts him gently "nothing is going to get out of control. you're worrying about this too much even for your standards."

"that's my job, mr. son."

"stop." when kihyun turns around he has to take a step back until he's leaning against the shelf, because hyunwoo is so much closer than he had expected him to be.

so they just stand there in an awkward position for a few moments as hyunwoo tries to think of even one way to begin this talk. 

"you know i care about your happiness. and i can't stand seeing you like this." hyunwoo gestures towards him, as if trying to communicate kihyun looks like a mess. which he may, but there is no need to make it blatantly obvious.

"i know it's been too much lately. i've been thinking about sending you on a vacation, or something. you deserve some rest."

kihyun's mouth falls slack at that and he feels himself threatening to explode.

"sending me- on a vacation?" he repeats slowly, trying to confirm those are the words that just left hyunwoo's mouth.

"you'd send me on a vacation right now? just get rid of me in the midst of all this?" he spits out, almost hissing at this point.

"if you don't need me anymore, just fucking tell me. you don't have to feel bad about firing me just because we're in some sort of messed up friendship."

hyunwoo looks completely dumbfounded. his mouth parts like he's trying to say something but it comes out silent, and his eyes are just scanning kihyun's face in panic and utter confusion.

"that's not- how could you say that?" he shakes his head. sounds as if he had just been so disappointed he can't even begin to speak about it.

"you think we're messed up?" when kihyun looks up to see into hyunwoo's eyes, they are sad. there's no returned anger in them, or outrage at the way kihyun is speaking to him, just sadness.

"i- that's not what i meant." kihyun mumbles, his legs starting to feel too weak to support him through this.

"i need you." hyunwoo takes a step closer, and his tone is different now "of course i still need you. kihyun, you know i'd be no one without you."

and kihyun knows he means that in terms of his career, but for a moment his heart takes it as something else and beats faster than it ever should.

"why are we messed up?" he asks without waiting for an answer. "what can i do to fix us?" he sounds so desperate as he asks that kihyun wants to cry, because he doesn't know the answer.

and in just moments kihyun's cold resolve crumbles completely and falls to hyunwoo's feet.

"it's not your fault." he answers, shaking his head and trying not to let the tears fall. 

hyunwoo moves himself forward even more and kihyun's every instinct screams at him to escape, but hyunwoo's hand slowly comes up to gently rest at the side of his face and the touch feels like it's burning. 

"it's okay." hyunwoo whispers as his silhouette swallows kihyun whole "i got you, ki." 

and before he knows it kihyun's cheeks are wet and so is hyunwoo's shoulder where he rests his head, and he curses himself for what he's doing until it makes him cry even more.

"talk to me, please." hyunwoo whispers as he nuzzles his head down in the crook of kihyun's neck. 

they've never been this close before. of course, they've hugged before, mostly when congratulating each other or during festivites but this is a different kind of hug in all kinds of ways.

"i kissed hyungwon." kihyun mumbles out in a broken voice, and his eyes shoot open as his brain tries to understand why the fuck he just confessed that to hyunwoo.

"is that... why you've been acting like this?" hyunwoo leans back, looking down at the boy.

he shakes his head no but then contradicts himself right after "i mean, yes. kind of. it's..."

"do you like him?" hyunwoo asks, his tone gentle and friendly and kihyun immediately looks up as his head shakes more violently now.

"no, not like that. i was so drunk and you were- you weren't there, it was just the two of us and i-... i regret it." 

"i'm sorry." hyunwoo squeezes his shoulder reassuringly but the levels of stupid kihyun is feeling at that moment can't be described.

"have you spoken to him? he's a reasonable man, i'm sure if you talk things out it won't ruin anything between you. you can't worry so much about it, cause it's ruining  _you_."

"i'm not worried about _that_." kihyun sniffs.

"what is it then, ki?"

kihyun takes a deep breath. this is the moment where he can put his true feelings out there and either have hyunwoo crush them once and for all with his polished shoes or throw him on this desk and kiss him like there's no tomorrow.

"nothing." kihyun replies after a long pause, shaking his head lightly as he looks up. "it's really nothing."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so... it's been like 5 months... i have no excuses. well i do actually ive been really busy with uni work and stuff on my mind of... personal nature (your boy is getting some is all i'm gonna say)
> 
> but yeah, i sat down and finished this chapter and decided to upload it. 
> 
> i promise i'm gonna update more frequently now! (well ill try)
> 
> still, if you read this thank you so much and if you've read the previous chapters before and came back for this, thank you so much for waiting x


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